· What’s the highest mountain you’ve climbed?
I have climbed virtually no mountains. This pains me! The highest I’mve been is “near the top of Illimani” but we had to turn back when my pal got altitude sickness.
· What’s your nickname?
Al? This interview isn’t going very well so far, is it!
· Funniest thing you’ve seen on a hill?
A friend getting such bad buttock chafing that he decided to try my facetious suggestion of lubricating with a banana…
· Have you ever Googled yourself?
Alas, yes.
· You’re in a pub. What’s on the menu?
Steak! Chips. Don’t bother with the veg…
· Who would play you in a movie about your life?
I’md love to say Brad Pitt. But more people thing I look like Boris Johnson…
· What was the last book you read?
The Right Stuff – Tom Woolfe
· What tastes best on the hill?
Biltong
· What’s scarier, heights or sharks?
Heights. (Refer to answer 1)
· What’s your favourite animal?
Elephant
· What’s the worst thing you’ve ever eaten?
Elephant. Not really… Balut in the Philippines (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Balut_(food))
· Weirdest place you’ve slept?
Sewage pipes on 3 continents.
· Most expensive piece of kit you own?
Canon 5D Mkii, and an Alpacka packraft.
· If you had to do a ‘˜real job’, what would it be?
Teacher
· Wild camp or posh hotel?
I’mll pick a posh hotel, please! Anyone can wild camp in wonderful, beautiful places any night they choose. A posh hotel is therefore a more novel and unattainable treat.
· Which celeb would you like to share a tent with?
Bruce Springsteen. I’mm intrigued by anyone who keeps their passion, quality of output, and integrity over a long career.
· Scafell Pike, Snowdon or Ben Nevis?
Scafell Pike. I’mm English, proud of it, and I love Wasdale.
· Who’s your mountaineering hero?
Felice Benuzzi, or Mark Twight (Kiss or Kill was one of my formative books)
· When were you last naked outdoors?
Yesterday. And I will be again tomorrow.
· Who’s your most famous friend?
I hate, hate people being labelled “famous”. I do loads of talks in schools and kids often ask if I am famous or a celebrity. Yuk. Sorry for the curmudgeonly answer!
· How much is a pint of tea at Pete’s Eats?
The last few times I’mve been there I’mve managed to dodge the bill!
· Your ultimate mountain day in three words’¦
Sunrise. Swim. Mates.
This interview originally appeared in Trail Magazine.
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